Harsh Lesson In Why Not To Hack

This was circulating around IRC for a while, 26 Apr 2005. The original text was in German and thus was translated. This is the original posting I believe.

* bitchchecker Quit (Ping timeout)
* bitchchecker has joined #stopHipHop
<bitchchecker> why do you kick me
<bitchchecker> can't you discus normally
<bitchchecker> answer!
<        Elch> we didn't kick you
<        Elch> you had a ping timeout: * bitchchecker Quit (Ping timeout)
<bitchchecker> what ping man
<bitchchecker> the timing of my pc is right
<bitchchecker> i even have dst
<bitchchecker> you banned me
<bitchchecker> amit it you son of a bitch
<HopperHunter> LOL
<HopperHunter> sh*t you're stupid, DST^^
<bitchchecker> shut your mouth WE HAVE DST!
<bitchchecker> for two weaks already
<bitchchecker> when you start your pc there is a message from windows that
               DST is applied.
<        Elch> You're a real computer expert
<bitchchecker> shut up i hack you
<        Elch> ok, i'm quiet, hope you don't show us how good a hacker you
               are ^^
<bitchchecker> tell me your network number man then you're dead
<        Elch> Eh, it's 129.0.0.1
<        Elch> or maybe 127.0.0.1
<        Elch> yes exactly that's it: 127.0.0.1 I'm waiting for you great
               attack
<bitchchecker> in five minutes your hard drive is deleted
<        Elch> Now I'm frightened
<bitchchecker> shut up you'll be gone
<bitchchecker> i have a program where i enter your ip and you're dead
<bitchchecker> say goodbye
<        Elch> to whom?
<bitchchecker> to you man
<bitchchecker> buy buy
<        Elch> I'm shivering thinking about such great Hack0rs like you
* bitchchecker Quit (Ping timeout)

What happened is clear: That guy entered his own IP-Adress in his mighty Hack-Tool and crashed his own PC. This way, the attack on my PC was a failure. I was already starting to think that I did not have to worry, but a good hacker never calls it a day. Two minutes later he returned.

* bitchchecker has joined #stopHipHop
<bitchchecker> dude be happy my pc crashed otherwise you'd be gone
<     Metanot> lol
<        Elch> bitchchecker: Then try hacking me again... I still have the
               same IP: 127.0.0.1
<bitchchecker> you're so stupid man
<bitchchecker> say buy buy
<     Metanot> ah, f**k off
<bitchchecker> buy buy elch
* bitchchecker Quit (Ping timeout)

There was a tension in the room... Would he manage, after these two failures, to crash my PC? I waited. Nothing happened. I felt relieve... Six minutes passed by until he prepared the next wave of attack. Being a Hacker, who usually cracks whole data centers, he knew what his problem was now.

* bitchchecker has joined #stopHipHop
<bitchchecker> elch you son of a bitch
<     Metanot> bitchchecker how old are you?
<        Elch> What's up bitchchecker?
<bitchchecker> you have a frie wal
<bitchchecker> fire wall
<        Elch> maybe, i don't know
<bitchchecker> i'm 26
<     Metanot> such behaviour with 26?
<        Elch> how did you find out that I have a firewall?
<     Metanot> tststs this is not very nice missy
<bitchchecker> because your gay fire wall directed my turn off signal back
               to me
<bitchchecker> be a man turn that sh*t off
<        Elch> cool, didn't know this was possible.
<bitchchecker> thn my virus destroys your pc man
<     Metanot> are you hacking yourselves?
<        Elch> yes bitchchecker is trying to hack me
<     Metanot> he bitchchecker if you're a hacker you have to get around a
               firewall even i can do that
<bitchchecker> yes man i hack the elch but the sucker has a fire wall
<     Metanot> what firewall do you have?
<bitchchecker> like a girl
<     Metanot> firewall is normal a normal hacker has to be able to get
               past it...you girl^^
<          He> Bitch give yourself a jackson and chill you're letting them
               provoce you and give those little girls new material all the
               time
<bitchchecker> turn the firewall off then i send you a virus f**ker
<        Elch> Noo
<     Metanot> he bitchchecker why turn it off, you should turn it off
<bitchchecker> you're afraid
<bitchchecker> i don't wanna hack like this if he hides like a girl behind
               a fire wall
<bitchchecker> elch turn off your sh*t wall!
<     Metanot> i wanted to say something about this, do you know the
               definition of hacking??? if he turns of the firewall that's
               an invitation and that has nothing to do with hacking
<bitchchecker> shut up
<     Metanot> lol
<bitchchecker> my grandma surfs with fire wall
<bitchchecker> and you suckers think you're cool and don't dare going into
               the internet without a fire wall

He calls me girly and says only his grandma would use a firewall. I know that elder people are much more intelligent then younger, but I couldn't let that rest. To see whether he really is a good hacker I lie and let everything as it is. I don't have a firewall at all, only my router.

<        Elch> bitchchecker, a collegue showed me how to turn the firewall
               off. Now you can try again
<     Metanot> bitchhacker can't hack
<       Black> nice play on words ^^
<bitchchecker> wort man
<        Elch> bitchchecker: I'm still waiting for your attack!
<     Metanot> how many times again he is no hacker
<bitchchecker> man do you want a virus
<bitchchecker> tell me your ip and it deletes your hard drive
<     Metanot> lol ne give it up i'm a hacker myself and i know how hackers
               behave and i can tell you 100.00% you're no hacker..^^
<        Elch> 127.0.0.1
<        Elch> it's easy
<bitchchecker> lolololol you so stupid man you'll be gone
<bitchchecker> and are the first files being deleted
<        Elch> mom...
<        Elch> i'll take a look

In panic I started the Windows Explorer, my heart beating faster. Had I under-estimated him?

<bitchchecker> don't need to rescue you can't son of a bitch
<        Elch> that's bad
<bitchchecker> elch you idiout your hard drive g: is deleted
<        Elch> yes, there's nothing i can do about it
<bitchchecker> and in 20 seconds f: is gone

Yes, true, G: and F: were gone. Did I ever have them? Doesn't matter, I did not have time to think, I was scared. bitchchecker was comforting me with a music tip.

<bitchchecker> tupac rules
<bitchchecker> elch you son of a bitch your f: is gone and e: too

Drive E:? Oh my god... All the games are there! And the vacation pictures! I instantly take a look. Everything still there. But the hacker said it was deleted....

Or isn't it happening on my computer?

<bitchchecker> and d: is at 45% you idiot lolololol
<           He> why doesn't meta say anything
<         Elch> he's probably rolling on the floor laughing
<        Black> ^^
< bitchchecker> your d: is gone
<           He> go on BITCH

The guy is good: My CD-drive is allegedly deleted! Bitchchecker turned my ancient disk sucker into a burner! But how did he do this? I'll have to ask him. Some encourage him. He himself is giving advice how to avoid the disaster on my hard drives.

<bitchchecker> elch man you're so stupid never give your ip on the internet
<bitchchecker> i'm already at c: 30 percent

Should I tell him he's not attacking my computer?

* bitchchecker Quit (Ping timeout)

Too late... It's 20:22 when we get the last message of our hacker with the alias "bitchchecker". We see that he has a "Ping timeout". We haven't seen him since then... must be the Daylight Saving Time.